Thursday, January 03, 2008

"Crabs got me where I am today" - Alaskan fisherman declared America's Next Top Model

All that guff back in 2000, everything was New Millennium this and New Millennium that. Try our new New Millennium french fries, exactly like the old ones except we’re selling them in the New fucking Millennium. Y2K was a complete disappointment, nothing important crashed, telecommunications ticked along, air travel continued unabated, toilet paper continued to come in regular or scented. Some people had to get new cheques issued that didn’t have “19__” in the date section but with teams of printers working round the clock this was soon rectified and old ladies were once again free to hold up check-out lines as they stubbornly continued to assert their right not to use an ATM card. 2000 was a complete non-event.

And here we are most way to 2010 already, ploughing headlong into a brave new world, one with iPods. A world where everybody gets a turn to be on TV, movie stars, hotel heiresses, Alaskan crab fishermen, George Bush, they let anybody on these days. The next pop-star/ model/ crab fisherman/ president of the united states is only a vote away, call now, only fifty cents. Hell, even Fiddy Cent is on TV and from what I can see he’s got all the charisma of dog turd with a bow on it. When you have nothing else, look stolid. Or guest-host Saturday Night Live, that’s still on. And still crap. That’s why.

But I put this injector cleaner stuff in my truck and it’s running really good now, so there’s that. Here’s to butoxyethanol!

Happy New Year.

SJ

1 comment:

SkookumJoe said...

had to check, yes, channel 122. what show, when? See if you can work the word "skookum" into a sentence.


because it's all about me isn't it?