Super Improved New Flavour

It's too bad you can't eat children.

It would solve a lot of problems with the poor countries.

It's not that you can't eat them. I mean there's no tough skin, it's not all gristle. I bet some of the pudgy ones would slice up like butter. But there's the taboo.

It's right there in the book:

Always fornicate outside the family but within the species, and don't eat children.

That was practical advice at one time. Early computer modelling predicted if a society ate all it's children there would soon be a shortage of society members to boss around. A whole army of marketing executives would be out of work and on the streets, begging for a demographic.

But these are tough times, things have changed. Poor kids don't buy anything. You often see them fetching water or languishing by a tin shack, but neither of these things has market value. That's not to say you couldn't get the kid to fetch some water before you eat it. That's called value-adding. The potential is enormous. Many children can even be trained to perform simple tasks around the home.

In the olden days they'd send kids down mines and up chimneys, all sorts of places. But they didn't eat them later because all the work made them tough and stringy despite a diet of straight porridge.

Best to get one or two fresh from the market, get them home to fetch some water and do some light dusting, then pop 'em right in the oven. If you were feeling ironic you could get them to peel the potatoes first.

This would provide income for the poor countries so they could buy stuff like proper people and eliminate the need for cows which make the global warming happen. Children do fart, but not as much as cows. On the other hand cows don't giggle uncontrollably afterwards.