Monday, March 19, 2007

How could you not?

If a woman gives me a full frontal hug, whether from love or sympathy, I cannot help but notice that there are breasts being pushed against me. This does not apply to relatives, thank christ. My old boss, whom I disliked with great zeal, gave me a hug at a staff party and the thoughts “get away from me” and “breasts are touching me” collided in my head so violently that all I could do was pat her stiffly on the back and stand up straight so she had to let go. This should be done slowly though, for if the hugger has interlocked their fingers behind your neck and you straighten too quickly, you may find them dangling from you, legs kicking, finger joints popping.

I always wondered if women, who hug each other with abandon, ever think the same thing. I know if I had breasts and those breasts pushed up against other breasts…well I’d sure notice something like that. Every single time.

7 comments:

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Nope, never.

I DO notice them when I try to play golf, though.

exile said...

it's the best

on a related note, today at the Chiropractor durring my adjustment the doctor strattled my knee... it was warm

Amanda said...

now I going to think about this post whenever I hug someone.
I notice mine when I try to see my feet.

Anonymous said...

Occasionally I notice it and it's never pleasant.

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

I totally noticed them today when I tried running in a push-up, not push-down, bra.

They jiggle a lot.

SkookumJoe said...

Totally. But can you get a bra that makes them juggle?

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Ow.