Monday, February 05, 2007

Dramatic Bear Rescue, for fuck sake.


This time we have a father and son camping in Ontario. A large black bear wandered into their camp during the middle of the day, which is unusual, and was only scared off after the son started banging a picnic table with a hatchet. They wisely decided to pack up and camp further down the lake.

As they are tootling down the lake in their little boat they hear cries for help and I don’t know about them but I would have been thinking “ohh, shit.” because of course the same bear had gone down to the next campsite where it savaged a married couple who apparently didn’t know about the bang-the-hatchet-on-the-table trick.

So our heroes bundle the woman who is bleeding heavily and her husband into the boat and they set off in search of help. Oh yes, they are 300km from the nearest hospital. It isn’t until they are underway that the husband collapses in the bottom of the boat and they discover he too is very badly hurt, most of his right shoulder is missing.

Lucky for the length of this story, they soon come across another boat manned by none other than a doctor and an off-duty cop. Not so lucky for the woman, who has expired by this point, but they get the husband on the bigger boat and off the cop races with the doctor providing ministrations all the way.

And that’s about it, the man spends some time in critical condition but lives, the bear is hunted down and shot. They find it has knife wounds from a previous attack. About it, except for our heroes. They never said what happened to the father and son, still out on the lake, floating on clear blue waters, sun sparkling, cool breeze from up the valley, fish plopping here and there, the mangled body of the woman beginning to stiffen in the bottom of the boat…

3 comments:

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Bears are mean. Sometimes.

Wisdom Weasel said...

The intrepid hatchet wielding duo could use the cadaver for either bait (muskies love it) or pemmican (a bit perfumey but tastes like pork).

Amanda said...

they didn't just go home and lock the door? what if the bear had a bigger and more pissed off brother?