A cat arrived for a breakfast meeting this morning and was horrified to find his business associate, a worm, being eaten alive by a bird, believed at this time to be a robin or small duck, who had apparently arrived early for the same meeting.
“I got there right at 7am, I was almost late because the car wouldn’t start, but I got there on time and saw [the worm] half way down the monster’s gullet!”, said the cat, it’s fur still poofy from fright.
The cat (who asked not to be named) then pounced on the bird and eviscerated it, leaving the body on the doorstep of a nearby home. By the time police arrived the cat had resuscitated the worm, although it is expected to lose several sections. “If it wasn’t for [the cat] and the fact I have multiple hearts, I’d be bird shit by now.” Said a grateful worm who also asked to remain anonymous - “I do underground work” was all he would say.
Police say no charges will be layed - "Its a cat. We can't arrest cats at this time." said a police spokesperson.
1 comment:
because arresting a cat would be silly
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