This here’s the new moggy, Polly. Polly comes fully functional – breathes, eats, shits, cleans itself and can be allowed outdoors without fear it will get into a car with a stranger. She is also quite good at chasing bits of string. As with all models in the Mammal range, Polly can learn behavior, but does not come with advanced features like planning/forethought, tool-making, or extrapolation and abstract thought. Unfortunately these upgrades are not yet available in the Feline brand of Mammal.
For the above advanced features, see our Primate range of Mammals. The Human* version of the Primate also comes with vocal ability and includes Bitch ‘n Moan 2006, Lies and Deceit, and the popular War Starter: Eternity Edition. (can be either a baby-killing redneck or a filthy hippy commie protester).*caution there are several know bugs in some models of Human brand Primates. If your Human shows signs of stupidity, this is normal. If however your human refuses to watch reality TV, it is not stupid enough and must be returned to the place of purchase for a free stupificationing.
7 comments:
According to Darwin, kittens are only a few years away from taking American jobs.
one of the humans i purchased started showing advanced intelectual potential, luckily rapping it's head with a tack hammer put a stop to it
luckily it was young enough to still have a "soft spot"
stupificationing, eh? explain yourself.
and the ones that are already stupid, can they be upgraded? maybe so they could work in fast food places.
HW (I can't call you just H. because there is that other H. -the angry one, and H. Wood is a bit stiff for this forum.) Perhaps it's like McCarthyism, except its kittens under the bed, not the Sons of Lennin
Yes Exile, a tack hammer is excellent for precise stupificationing, but in an emergency a hefty stone or elbow to the bridge of the nose will do.
Amanda see above.
byw, is that you in the pic?
skook- yeah, but if you break the nose then they'll be ugly and stupid and who would want that?
(answer: see Owen Wilson)
Am I Eye-patch Boy? nah, just another reason i'll never post pics of my kids on this blog.
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