A thoughtful reader in Ethiopia sent me a baboon for clinical trials (a free T-shirt is on the way!) and here you can see where we are up to. Using parts from an old DVD player I managed to give this one a laser beam eye thing which is kinda cool, but he also plays most popular audio and video formats. The little bugger tried to bite off my finger but I managed to hit EJECT in time and...oh shit he's escaped!.....wait there!...
...Damn it. I didn't put a laser-proof lock on the cage. I meant to, but you know I just totally forgot. The bloody dogs chased it up a tree, then it was on the roof...man he was pissed off...he jumped on the back of a passing chicken truck, there was a terrible squawking and last I saw he disappeared down the road in a cloud of feathers.
Oh well she'll be right, as they say. He's only got enough battery power for two or three more laser shots...after that he'll be helpless against the kangaroos. Unless he makes it to town...
5 comments:
What if he gets on a bus? Scowling monkeys will seem like a treat then!
A smell a second sequel to "Speed."
You microchipped him first, right? Like we'd discussed at meeting 347?
Monkey Lojak! I totally forgot about that mandate.
It's all going to be fine. After Speed 3: Baboons on the Bus, of course
rule one- don't fuck with nature with out a back up plan
rule two- when the back up plan fails (and it will) besure the remote detonation device is simple to operate.
rule three- when the remote detonation device fails (cause, why would you make a working one?). create another, more powerful, baboon to fight the original proto-types
ok people, nothing to get upset about, just remember, on baboon X-2, let's put a leash on the little bastard.
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