Voting is mandatory in Australia. If you do not vote in an election you must fill out a form explaining why or pay $130 fine. Nowhere is there a provision for "voting by not voting", if you spoil your ballot it automatically counts toward the encumbant party. In the last election a friend of mine failed to vote and was sent the form asking him to explain why, or face fine. I told him to write that he was an alcoholic and was on a 3-day drinking binge during the election and when he sobered up, found he had missed it. This is what he wrote and as far as I know he never heard anything further.
It is census time in Australia and it fell to the unemployed member of the house to fill out the form (this one is $100/day fine for not filling out the census). As I was neatly writing in black or blue pen, filling each box in turn with capital letters, crossing out mistakes with a horizontal slash (not diagonal) as per the lengthy instructions, I began to wonder just how closely they read these things...
Does anyone in the household require help speaking or communicating?
YES: Person 4 uses made-up words, and must be beaten regularly.
Does anyone in the household require help, or someone to be with them, for bodily movements?
YES: Although Person 3 has no trouble with bodily movements, they are quite stinky and, frankly, we're a little worried.
Does anyone in the household require assistance getting in or out of bed?
YES: Person 3 again. Won't get out of bed until at least 10am on weekends.
Religion?
OTHER: Buddhism 2.0, the Buddha's back and he's not smiling.
Highest level of schooling/training completed?
Level 2 Beginner's Swimming - wouldn't open eyes under water, but gave it to me anyway when I started crying.
For each female, how many babies has she ever given birth to?
Pretty sure it's just the two...why what have you heard?
9 comments:
You would be my hero if you actually sent it in with those answers.
Why not join the 390,000 people in England and Wales who profess to be Jedi?
what are you implying exo? That I make this stuff up?
Sandra I have nothing against the Welsh, but I don't want to be associated with a bunch of English geeks.
I think I'll start calling the children persons three and four. I like that.
are you going to include the dogs and cats too?
What about the baboons? Do they need to be accounted for too?
(Once they're created, I mean.)
Hilarious! Lol. I can't believe voting is mandatory there! How about that?!? And why had I never ever heard that before?
By the way, you just had an election? (So sorry for this ignorance; it's state enforced because I watch the world news EVERY NIGHT and have unfortunately not heard that Australia just had an election.... what's wrong with this picture??)
If I sent in those answers, I'd be living in Gitmo Bay right now.
so what would they do with a Cuban terrorist? Intern them in Iraq?
Ellocyn fear not, you have not missed an Australian election but there should be one next year if you want to mark it on the callendar. It's good fun, the loser gets torn apart by specially trained savage kangaroos.
i like how they ask if your female has had her first litter
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