Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Mission Quite Likely

Ok the first mission was really really hard, not as impossible as you at first thought, but still bloody tough. But now you’ve managed to do three “impossible” missions haven’t you? I mean it’s a bit silly still calling them Missions Impossible isn’t it? Everyone appreciates how difficult the missions were, but clearly they were not impossible at all. I don’t know the details of the last one, but I’m sure you managed to wrap it up in 2-3 hours. I have heard some of those civil servants over at the CIA take months or years to wrap up missions, and they don’t go on and on about how “impossible” they are, do they?

That said, your base rate of pay for future missions will begin in the Rather Tricky bracket. Should the mission prove more difficult, please submit the correct documentation and you’ll be bumped up to either the Pretty Hard, Really Hard or What A Bitch categories. You will now only receive the Impossible rate of pay for missions which indeed turn out to be impossible. That is, any where you actually die in the attempt.

Thanks for coming in. Sasha will validate your parking.

6 comments:

Sandra said...

But it was really really difficult! What with the aliens and the phantom pregnancy and the water pistols and everything!

exile said...

in all fair ness he just had a kid

i mean, a gay guy had sex with a woman enough to knock her up, how impossible do you want it?

Dan said...

I would have gone with "Mission: Holy Fucking Shit Do You Really Expect Me To Pull This Off?!"

SkookumJoe said...

water pistols, aliens...I should read the tabloids more.

exile, but still not actually impossible. Chances of me knocking up Katie Holmes much more impossibler.

I know Dan, I could NOT think of anything else.

Unknown said...

I’m not sure, but I think the M.I. sequels were written by the same jerks as “The NeverEnding Story” sequels and “The Last Temptation of Christ 2”.

SkookumJoe said...

"Jesus II: Judgement Day" is the original sequel...though the release date is still up in the air